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Apples of Gold
Radio Script for April 28, 2008
“Ministry Starts at Home”
Hello, I’m Doug Apple…with Apples of Gold.
I know a man who loves the ministry.
He is all about the ministry.
But I keep reminding him, “Your first ministry is to your wife and children.”
What happens is, sometimes we confuse putting the Lord first with putting ministry first.
It is very tempting for Christian men to put their ministries ahead of their wives. But I believe our first ministry is to our wives. There is only one human being that the Bible says we are “one” with.
First Timothy chapter three puts this in perspective. One of the prerequisites for ministry leaders is that they do a good job with their families. That comes first. Verse five says, “If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?”
See, the family ministry comes before any ministry outside the family. Until you have the family ministry on a good foundation, you have no business trying to do ministry anywhere else.
Ephesians 5 says, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her…” Verse 28 says, “…husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies.” Verse 29 says, “After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church…”
Ministers often quote the words of Jesus who said, “I will build My church.” If husbands are to love their wives as Christ loves the church, then husbands should say, “I will build my wife, and the gates of hell will not prevail against her.”
But what happens is, many ministers take over Jesus’ job and start saying of themselves, “I will build my church,” and then the gates of hell end up prevailing against their families.
First Timothy 5:4 says if you really want to get into ministry, start by caring for your own family. Verse 8 says that if you don’t provide for your own family, you have denied the faith and are worse than an unbeliever.
In Mark chapter seven we read about a Jewish tradition called Corban. That’s when someone had the means to provide for their father or mother, but instead they put the money into ministry. Jesus set them straight, reminding them of the commandment to “honor your father and your mother.”
Now let me tell you, there are Bible verses that seem to indicate that we should put ministry ahead of family. For example, take a look at First Corinthians 7:29: “What I mean, brothers, is that the time is short. From now on those who have wives should live as if they had none…”
Now that sounds like a license to act like you aren’t married at all! Why go home? Why even have a home? After all, you’re living as if you have no wife, just like it says in First Corinthians 7:29.
Well let’s look at the rest of that portion of scripture. If you are to live as if you aren’t married, what does that mean? Verse 32 says, “An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord’s affairs – how he can please the Lord.” Verse 35 says, “that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord.”
It says the same thing for the unmarried woman, that she won’t be concerned about the affairs of this world, but that she will be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.
First Corinthians 7:9 can’t mean that it’s okay to stop providing for your family because that contradicts other scriptures.
So what are we to do? We married men and women are to serve the Lord with an undivided passion – and that service starts at home.
Think about it. Who steps over one person who needs ministry to get to someone else who needs ministry? It makes sense to minister to the first person you come to, and that person is your spouse, then your children and the rest of your own family.
Now what about Luke 18:29, where Jesus talks about leaving your home and family for the sake of the kingdom of God?
There is obviously a time for that, but it must balance with First Corinthians 7:4 which says, “The wife’s body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband’s body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.”
So if the husband wants to spend a year in ministry to the Aborigines, and the wife is not in agreement, I don’t think the husband should go. His body doesn’t belong to him alone, so he can’t make the decision alone to leave like that. They must be in agreement.
Now I know some men will rebel at that. They will say, “Hey, this is the ministry the Lord has called me to, so I’m going. I can’t help it if my wife doesn’t hear the Lord like I do.”
Well, you should have thought of that before you got married. But once you are married, you have given yourself to your wife, and now those decisions are not yours alone, because your body is not yours alone.
If you leave and she doesn’t want you to leave, how are you loving your wife like Christ loves the church? What happened to, “I will build my wife”?
Now someone might quote Jesus’ words in Luke 14:26, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his father and mother, his wife and children, his brothers and sisters – yes, even his own life – he cannot be my disciple.”
Some will quote that as a reason to put ministry before family. Yes, it’s true that Jesus comes before everyone else. But then, as His disciples, we take up our cross, and we immediately begin pouring ourselves out for other people – starting with the people in our own home.
So do you have a passion for Christian ministry? That’s a wonderful thing. And while you think about your ministry, think about this:
Ministry starts at home.
Comments?
E-mail me: dougapple@wave94.com.
May God bless you today! With Apples of Gold…I’m Doug Apple.
A skeptic wonders about Luke 14:26, why Jesus would say that we should “hate” people. That statement contradicts so many others in the Bible that say we should love people. So why did He say it?
It was not literal. It was a figure of speech, just as the next verse about carrying our cross was a figure of speech. It was hyperbole. We all know that Jesus didn’t tell us to literally pick up a real cross and start carrying it around. He said we should “hate” other people to show the sharp contrast we should have in our devotion. We should be so devoted to being His disciple that every other relationship seems despicable by comparison.
© 2008 The Arrow’s Tip
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(Proverbs 25:11 – “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”)
Why “The Arrow’s Tip”? Each morning, after diligently seeking the Lord, I write Apples of Gold. Then before I release it to the public I pray one final prayer, “Lord, send forth your arrows.” I envision Apples of Gold as arrows, tips dipped in the river of the water of life that flows from the throne of God (Rev. 22:1), sailing toward the hearts and minds of men and women around the world.
Doug Apple
General Manager - Wave 94
Christian Radio for Tallahassee
PO Box 4105
Tallahassee, FL 32315
(850) 926-8000
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