Jim Dandy Billy Goat

(click to listen)

I’m Doug Apple...and my heart is on fire.  (Luke 24:32)

“Don’t say holy cow.”

“No, not holy mackerel, either.”

“And definitely not holy cra….you know what.”

“Look,” I told my grandsons, “Holy is a word.  It has a meaning.  A serious meaning.  To say it any other way is to say it in vain, which means to water it down.”

“What does it mean?  Well, I think of holy as being separated, like separated from sin.  God is separated from sin and He wants us to be separated from sin, to be holy, to be righteous, to not sin.”

“Plus, when you say, ‘holy…whatever,’ that’s not what you really mean anyway.  You mean something else, like, ‘I’m shocked,’ or ‘That’s amazing,’ or ‘What a surprise.’  So why not just say what you mean instead of using the word holy in vain?”

One grandson said, “Because it’s more fun!”

I said, “When you say it, does anyone laugh?  Does anyone even smile?  Do you even smile?  It must not be that fun.”

“And if you want to have fun, then make up your own exclamation.”

Then I told them about former Florida State Seminoles football coach Bobby Bowden and how he used to say, “Dadgummit.”

Then I told them about my dad, their great-grandfather.

I never heard my dad say a single bad word.  Ever.  

I remember one time when I was a young teenager, and Dad was at home, off work, and a call came in from work.  You could tell it was something stressful, some kind of problem he had to solve.  It was the kind of moment where a mom shushes all the kids or scuttles them out of the room.  Dad needs space to solve this problem

I was listening closely.  What was going on?  What would Dad say?

Here’s what he said.  This is the exclamation that came out of his mouth.  He said, “Jim dandy billy goat.”

Ha ha, okay, that’s about the extent of my dad’s blue language.  Jim dandy billy goat.

So if you must exclaim something, and you don’t want to say the words you actually mean, please don’t fall into the age-old traps of cursing or blue language or taking the Lord’s name in vain.  Don’t even take the word “holy” in vain because it’s a real word with a serious meaning and we don’t want to water it down.

Instead, come up with some fun words of your very own.

Or you could just say it like my dad said it, “Jim dandy billy goat.”

May God bless you today.

I’m Doug Apple.