Stop Stealing From Your Spouse

I almost never dream.

But last night I had not one, but three very vivid dreams.

In the first one I had friends who owned a large ATV dealership.  They showed me a pair of customized “four-wheelers” designed to go together, perfect for some romantic couple for Valentine’s Day.

Now these owners trusted me a lot.  I even had keys to their dealership. 

Well I thought of the perfect couple for those romantic four-wheelers.  So I let myself in, hitched them together and drove them off to show this other couple. 

Somehow (you know how dreams are) the four-wheelers got lost.  We couldn’t find them anywhere.  I thought, “How can I face my friends?  They trusted me completely, and I was just trying to help, but look what I’ve done.”

Then immediately came my second dream.

It was halftime at a college basketball game.  The band was playing, and I was out in the hall.  A band from another school, all dressed up, came down the hall.  They said they wanted to hear the band that was playing, and wanted to know if it was okay if they went in and watched.  I said, “Sure, why not?”

I held the door while they funneled in.  Then to my horror they started playing, blasting their horns louder than the actual halftime band.  The halftime show was ruined, and I was to blame.

Then came my third dream.

I was alone in a friend’s garage.  He was restoring a really old pickup.  I got in, and immediately the truck began to roll.  I hit the brakes, but they weren’t hooked up.  I jumped out and got it to stop, but not before it bumped into a work bench, putting a big dent in the hood.

I woke up, and it was all so vivid I prayed, “Lord, is this just nonsense, or is there something to it?”

Immediately I thought of the person who told me recently about an “emotional affair,” and I thought of this phrase, “Stop stealing from your spouse.”

What do my dreams have to do with stealing from your spouse?

Your spouse has put their trust in you.  You probably share houses and cars and bank accounts.  They sacrificed all future romantic possibilities just to be with you.  They have put all their eggs in your basket.

Like my friends who owned the dealership.  They trusted me completely, even with the keys to their business.  I didn’t mean to steal from them, but that’s what I did.  I took what belonged to them and lost it.

Your heart and emotional energy belong to your spouse.  They are trusting you.  If you are giving your emotional energy to someone else, you have stolen from them, even if you didn’t mean to.

In my second dream, I gave that band permission to go where they did not belong.  I thought it was no big deal, but I was wrong.  As soon as I opened that door, the situation was out of my control. 

In an emotional affair, you let someone go where they do not belong, into your heart.    You think you have it under control, but you do not.  That band will begin blasting so loud it will ruin what the rightful band is playing.  What seemed so innocent, even helpful at the beginning, will turn into an obnoxious, discordant mess. 

In my third dream, no one knew I was in that garage.  No one knew I slipped into my friend’s old truck.  But what I didn’t know was that once it began rolling, I couldn’t stop it. 

Maybe you are having an emotional affair, and no one knows.  Your secret is safe, and you can stop it anytime you want.  My friend, you have been deceived.  Those brakes don’t work.  Once an emotional affair gets rolling, it’s hard to stop.  And here is one thing you can bet on, there will be damage.

This may not sound like a nice, romantic story.  But for someone, it will be the best thing you can do for your spouse.  Sure, you may not be involved physically, but if you are giving your emotional energy to someone else, then stop it.  Make it a gift.  Decide today to stop stealing from your spouse.

(as heard on Wave 94.1 FM)

dougapple@wave94.com

www.wave94.com

 

Who Do You Love?

“I can’t wait to retire,” she said.

“What are you going to do then?” I asked.

“I’m gonna move way out in the country, where I can be near God’s creation.”

“ And away from people…” I added for her.

“Yes, away from all these crazy people,” she said.

“But people are the CROWN of God’s creation!” I said. “If you want to be near God’s creation, you need to surround yourself with people, then love them like God loves them.”

We get so busy with our duties that we forget our supreme duty - to love people.

One time I was driving home from church with my teenage son. You know how sometimes you have to pry things out of your teenagers? In this case I pried it out, then wished I could put it back!

So we’re driving along in the dark, and my son suddenly says, “When I move out, the first thing I’m going to do is get my lip pierced.”

“Why on earth would you do that?” I said.

“Just over on the side,” he said, as if that would make me feel better.

Then he said, “Well, what would you do if I did that?”

I said, “First of all, I would still love you. I will love you no matter what.”

Jesus calls us to love everyone. But being finite, I can’t really get to everyone in order to love them, so I made up this priority list about who to love first.

It starts with my wife. If you are married, there is only one person you are “one” with. So at the top of your “love list” must be your spouse.

If you are married with children, remember your spouse comes before the children, even though the children can be more demanding and time consuming. The children need to move out and move on someday, but you are “one” with your spouse - ’til death do you part. Make sure your husband or wife is at the top of your love list everyday. Have you done something special for your spouse lately? This would be an excellent time.

Second on my love list is my children, especially while they are growing up. Of all the people on the planet, I am most responsible for my own kids. Our pastor reminded us recently that we are to be our kid’s parents, not their best friends. Yes, sometimes you just have fun with your children, like a friend would. But other times you have to lay down the law. When they are toddlers, you may have to exert authority to keep them from hurting themselves. And that holds true until they grow up and move out. But it’s always done with love as the motivation.

So, you love your spouse first, and your children second.

Now, what if you don’t have a spouse or children, or if you do, who is next on your priority list of whom to love? Your parents. The Bible offers specific instructions about how we are to treat our parents. They must be high on our love list. Then come other family members, including siblings, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, even in-laws.

And after our family members, for Christians the call is clear. We are to love our fellow believers.* Then after that we are simply called to love our “neighbor,” meaning anyone we happen to encounter on any given day.**

So here is my priority list again:

First is my spouse, then my children. Next are my parents, followed by other family members. Then come my bothers and sisters in Christ. And finally just loving anyone God brings into my life today.

I know dealing with people can be the most aggravating and irritating part of the day. That’s why we need to work on it, and keep our priorities straight.

“But wait a minute, Doug. You didn’t mention friends.”

Yes, we should love our friends, obviously. But I compare that to making sure you eat your favorite food. You don’t have to make a point to do it.

So take a look at your schedule. How do you spend your time? Who is getting your emotional energy and resources? Ask yourself the tough question, “Am I doing what I need to do to love the people I’m supposed to be loving?

Comments? E-mail me: dougapple@wave94.com.

* Galatians 6:10 “Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.”
** Luke 10

Get Wisdom - No Matter What It Costs You

I was more judgmental as a young man.

When I saw a weakness in someone I judged them to be weak.

Then along came an older man whom I respected highly.  He was a successful businessman and outspoken about his faith.  He had a nice family.  He was very gracious and loving, and when he smiled you thought “Now there is the true joy of the Lord.”

I’ll never forget the day he told me that he and his wife had gone for marriage counseling. 

I wonder if the shock showed on my face.

I had always held him in high esteem, and now I find out that his marriage is crumbling?

The shock must have shown, because he said, “Oh, it’s nothing bad.  Just some things we are working on to make our marriage stronger.”

That was quite a few years ago, and over time I have grown to respect what he did more and more.

I guess I’m the typical American male.  And one thing we don’t do is admit to having weaknesses.  Oh, we know we have them, but we work on them in private.  We try to fix things ourselves before anyone finds out.

The thing is, if we don’t ask for help, we don’t get any.  And if we think we are smart enough to handle everything alone we are wrong – and dumb.

This man saw some weaknesses in his marriage.  Instead of trying to solve them alone, he knew enough to know that a wise counselor could help them be much stronger.  He was willing to humble himself.  That humbling was a price he was willing to pay in order to get some wisdom for his marriage.

His action reminds me of Proverbs 4:7 which tells us to get wisdom, no matter what it costs.

In his case it cost him the humbling of asking for help, the money for the counselor, and the time spent in counseling when he could have been conducting business.

But what if he hadn’t paid that price?  Think of the cost of a wrecked marriage.  Think of the cost of a divorce.  Or even the emotional toll of a dysfunctional marriage.  Those are all much higher prices than the cost of getting some wise counsel.

That’s why the Bible places the value of wisdom so high.  King Solomon said, “Get wisdom…though it cost you all you have…”

Then he explains the value.  “When you walk, your steps will not be hampered; when you run, you will not stumble.”*

Do you feel like your walk is hampered?  Does it feel like just as you begin to run, you stumble? 

Maybe it’s time to stop trying to handle it by yourself.  Get some help.  Seek some wise counsel. 

Yes, there is a price.  Yes, it will be humbling.  It will cost you time and money.  But think of the time and money wasted every time you stumble.  Get those stumbling blocks out of the way. 

Think about this, you would have already removed your stumbling blocks by yourself, if you could.  So whatever stumbling blocks are still tripping you up are probably stumbling blocks you need help with.

Why wait any longer?  Get the help you need and get them out of the way. 

It’s time to get wisdom, whatever it costs you.

(as featured on Wave 94.1 FM)

dougapple@wave94.com

www.wave94.com

 

Get Your Goat

Radio Script for November 30, 2006

“Get Your Goat”

Hello, I’m Doug Apple…with Apples of Gold.

Have you ever heard the phrase “Get your goat”?

No one seems to know exactly where it came from, or if it might actually be “get your goad,” but either way it means the same thing. If someone “gets your goat” it means they got to you. They got through your defenses and upset you.

So the question is, what does it take to get your goat?

If you have a short fuse, you’re easy. Anybody can get your goat. Your personal peace is paper thin, and the first drop of rain spoils it.

Maybe you pride yourself on being stable and rational. But you know how it goes. Along comes someone who will not give up. They keep pushing buttons until they find the right ones.

What is the sign that someone has “got your goat?” When you overreact. Your reaction is not calm and measured, but it suddenly bursts forth in an irrational display of emotion.

Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick is in the news this week because someone got his goat. His team played poorly, and as they walked off the field a fan yelled something offensive to Michael Vick. That was it. He had had enough. He flashed the single digit sign language for “you got my goat.” And the league fined him $10,000.

Sure he was frustrated. Sure the fan was offensive. But Vick reacted as if he and the fan was all there was. Obviously the league didn’t see it that way. There is a much larger picture that Vick ignored, and it cost him 10 grand.

Usually when someone gets our goat and we overreact, it’s because we are not seeing the big picture. If we saw the big picture, we would react differently.

In driver’s ed we were taught not to swerve for small animals. “Why not? We don’t want to murder the cute little bunny.” Because you and the bunny is not all there is. The bigger picture shows the wreck you might have if you jerk the wheel.

Another lesson from driver’s ed. We were taught to look further down the road in order to keep the car steady. If you only look at the road directly in front of you, you will constantly turn the wheel, reacting to every little thing.

The same is true in life. To be steady and stable, we need to look further down the road.

When Paul wrote the book of Ephesians, he said he was “a prisoner for the Lord.” He could have focused on the walls of his confinement. It could have gotten his goat. I mean, how unfair is it to be in prison for serving God and loving people?

But he looked beyond the walls and saw the bigger picture. He wrote things like, “…how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ…” He wrote, to God be the glory “…throughout all generations, forever and ever!”

Talk about seeing the big picture! Paul saw beyond the walls, beyond his own life, out through all the coming generations. And it brought him incredible peace and stability, in spite of all the people trying to get his goat.

Michael Vick was “had” as soon as he focused on that fan and got caught up in the flurry of the moment.

The same happens to us at school, at work, at home. Our peace is lost when we let someone get to us. We focus on them, when we need to look beyond them, to the bigger picture.

What is the bigger picture? The bigger picture is beyond our little situation, beyond whatever we are struggling with. The bigger picture goes beyond our little lives to the grand, eternal scheme of things under the control of the Lord God Almighty.

HE is the big picture. HE is our motivation. HE is our focus in life. Paul writes that we can be “filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” *

I don’t know about you, but I want that. I want to be “filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

Then I know that I will be stable and strong in all circumstances. I will see past the flurry of the moment. And I’ll know that no matter who comes along, and no matter how many buttons they push, they will not be able to “get my goat.”

Comments?

E-mail me…dougapple@wave94.com.

May God bless you today! With Apples of Gold…I’m Doug Apple.

* Ephesians 4:19

© 2006 Darling Child al Fine

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(Proverbs 25:11 – “A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”)

Fine (pronounced "feenay') is the Italian word for "end." D.C. al Fine tells you to go back to the beginning of the piece and repeat until you come to the marking Fine. In the Christian life, we must keep coming back to the beginning…our childlike faith in the forgiveness freely given by our Heavenly Father…at the foot of the cross.

Do You Have a Little Pet Sin?

Are you a Christian?  Are you one of God’s people?

O.K.  Now…do you have a little pet sin that you are allowing in your life?

Just one little area that you are holding back from complete surrender to God?

Why would you do that?  Because it’s exciting?  Because it’s fun?  Because God will make you give it up and you don’t want to?

My friend, remember the thrill of being close to God!  There is no higher high than being close to your Creator, your Heavenly Father, your Savior.  There is no sin, no suspect activity, nothing on the fringes that will do you any good.

If you are toying with this certain sin in your life, beware.  It will destroy you.  If you think it’s O.K.  If you think this one little thing won’t destroy you because everything else in your life is generally in line…good job…good home…don’t be fooled…one drop of poison poisons the whole drink.

Sin is not to be toyed with.  Plus…it is a lie!  It is not what you are making it out to be.  It will thrill you, then the thrill will quickly turn to torture…and if you don’t surrender it to God, it will eventually kill you.

Stop and think…this sin in your life…can’t you feel its corrosive nature?  With Christ you are like stainless steel…His forgiveness and grace make you clean and strong.  But when you harbor a sin in your life, rust begins…and weakness.

We are not strong people.  Sin is a temptation for everyone.  That is why we must fall on our knees in surrender to Christ our King each day.  Have you fallen on your knees today in surrender to Christ your King?  Don’t be too “big” to lift your hands to God and say, “I give up.  I surrender.”  Remember the old hymn, “All to Jesus, I surrender, all to Thee I freely give…”

Give it all up to Jesus now…and that includes this pet sin of yours.  I mean…listen to me…even if it is fun…don’t you feel the dark side of it?  Don’t you see the looming crash in the future?  Listen and heed this warning today!  

Now God is gracious and kind…but he hates sin and He does not put up with it.  Some people think God is so loving that He will let a little sin slide.  Not at all!  It is precisely BECAUSE He loves us so much that he is so hard on sin.  Sin kills.  Sin maims.  It hurts people.  It destroys marriages.  Sin crushes families.  It wipes out businesses.  It splits churches….it never does a bit of good…never!  That is why God hates it so much, and when push comes to shove, He will use explosive means to wipe it out.  

God is talking to you right now.  He wants to cleanse you of this sin.  Turn to Him right now and ask for forgiveness.  Repent…turn from all sin..and toward Him.  This is not a game.  God, your Heavenly Father loves you, but you are like a child standing in the middle of the street, and the truck of sin is bearing down on you.  He is calling to you to get out of the middle of the street…and He is raising His voice, can’t you hear it getting louder and louder?  And He is getting angry that you are not listening.  That’s right, God gets angry when He sees His children not listening and not obeying.  

There is a horrifying text in Ezekiel 24:13 – The Lord says to His people:  “I tried to cleanse you but you would not be cleansed…”

A Secular Workplace – Part Two

It’s Monday morning and, congratulations, you are starting a new job!  The question is, how do you conduct yourself, as a Christian?

“Let Them Know”

In a new job you always meet new people.  You don’t know them and they don’t know you.  There is something very important about you that they need to learn right up front.  One way or another, subtle or overt,  I think it is important that you let people know that you are a Christian.

“It Affects Their Conduct”

Why is there an urgency to let your new coworkers know about your faith?  First of all, it should set a standard of conduct for those around you.  Hopefully they will clean up their language and their jokes out of respect.  Hopefully they will refrain from taking the Lord’s name in vain.  They will know not to ask you to join them if they are making plans unfit for a Christian.  You won’t have to hear such things as, “You want to go to the bar after work?” or “Check out this racy website” or “We’re leaving early, can you clock us out at quitting time?”  I know it’s not always that simple, but at least your more civilized coworkers will respect where you stand.

“It Affects Your Conduct”

When you let people know you are a Christian, it forces you to live like one.  Immediately you have a higher standard of morality to live by.  They will expect you (and put pressure on you) to be honest and truthful.  You will have to keep your own language and jokes clean.  You can’t join in on certain office high jinx.  You will be forced to pass on various after-hours activities. Anything less than good Christian behavior and you will be labeled a hypocrite.  

“It Affects Their Lives”

When your coworkers want to live in the darkness, you (the Christian) will be an annoying light that ruins the atmosphere.  But the darkness is a terrible place to live.  Situations will arise in your coworkers’ lives, and they will seek you out for help.  They knew from day one that you were a Christian – a source of wisdom, love and mercy – and they will come to you when the time is right.  On that day you will be glad that you began your new job with the label “Christian.”

Follow the Bishop's Example

The crime? Stealing bread. That's what sent Jean Valjean to prison, where he stayed for 19 years in France two centuries ago. Even after his release he was marked as an ex-convict and found life very difficult. 

What Jean Valjean needed was a break. What he needed was mercy, but no one was offering him any. Desperate, he turned thief once again and stole. And once again he was caught. His chance of ever living a full life was over, if it were not for mercy.

In his famous “Sermon on the Mount” Jesus said, “Blessed are the merciful…” (Matt. 5:7) In Matthew 9:13 he is quoted as saying, “But go and learn what this means: 'I desire mercy, not sacrifice.'” 

What if we don't feel like being merciful? James 2:13 says, “…judgment without mercy will be shown to anyone who has not been merciful…”

In Matthew 18 we read an excellent illustration of mercy in action, as well as the “judgment without mercy” that will be shown to us if we are not merciful:

“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt. 

The servant fell on his knees before him. `Be patient with me,' he begged, `and I will pay back everything.' The servant's master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go. But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. `Pay back what you owe me!' he demanded. 

His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged him, `Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.' But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened. 

Then the master called the servant in. `You wicked servant,' he said, `I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn't you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?' In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed. This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” 

It is wise to show mercy. In fact, James 3:17 describes the “wisdom that comes from heaven” as being “full of mercy”. A truly wise person is a person truly full of mercy. Of course the Pharisees of Jesus' day fell short of that great wisdom. In Matthew 23:23 Jesus charged them with failing to be merciful. He considered showing mercy to be one of the “more important matters of the law”.

Another great example of mercy in the Bible is Jesus' story of the Good Samaritan. The Samaritan sees a man in need, and gives of his own money to take care of him. The Samaritan is described in Luke 10:37 as “…the one who had mercy…” 

Who are we to have mercy on? Like the Good Samaritan, we are to have mercy on whomever we come across who needs mercy. We are to be merciful, even when the person may not deserve it. God is merciful to the undeserving (like, you and me, for instance). He is our example, like it says in Luke 6:36, “Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.” 

I began with the story of Jean Valjean. He is a fictional character from Victor Hugo's classic “Les Miserables.” His last crime was committed against an old Bishop with whom he had just spent the night and enjoyed a meal. Jean Valjean stole the Bishop's silverware, was caught and hauled back to the Bishop's residence. Read now the Bishop's wonderful example of mercy: 

"Ah! here you are!" he exclaimed, looking at Jean Valjean. "I am glad to see you. Well, but how is this? I gave you the candlesticks too, which are of silver like the rest, and for which you can certainly get two hundred francs. Why did you not carry them away with your forks and spoons?" 

Jean Valjean opened his eyes wide, and stared at the venerable Bishop. "Monseigneur," said the brigadier of gendarmes, "so what this man said is true, then? We came across him. He was walking like a man who is running away. We stopped him to look into the matter. He had this silver -- " 

"And he told you," interposed the Bishop with a smile, "that it had been given to him by a kind old fellow of a priest with whom he had passed the night? I see how the matter stands. And you have brought him back here? It is a mistake." The gendarmes released Jean Valjean, who recoiled. "Is it true that I am to be released?” 

"My friend," resumed the Bishop, "before you go, here are your candlesticks. Take them." Jean Valjean was trembling in every limb. He took the two candlesticks mechanically, and with a bewildered air. He was like a man on the point of fainting. 

The Bishop drew near to him, and said in a low voice: "Do not forget, never forget, that you have promised to use this money in becoming an honest man. Jean Valjean, my brother, you no longer belong to evil, but to good. It is your soul that I buy from you; I withdraw it from black thoughts and the spirit of perdition, and I give it to God." 

As we begin a new year, may we all follow the Bishop's example. May we all follow the example of the Good Samaritan and even the example of our Father Himself. May we all be more merciful to our fellowman.

My New Prayer

“Lord, make yourself known…”  That is my new prayer, both for myself and everyone else.  I pray this for myself:  “Lord, make yourself known to me.”  I pray this for others:  “Lord, make yourself known to my wife.”  “Lord, make yourself known to my son.”  You get the point.  When I think of someone who needs prayer, this is my new prayer for them, “Lord, make yourself known to them.”

Lord, Make Yourself Known

My new prayer stems from a thought I had while reading in Isaiah chapter 19.  A prophecy is spoken concerning Egypt, that the time would come when “the Lord will make himself known to the Egyptians…”  I thought, “Man, I don’t want to wait for some prophetic or even apocalyptic point in time.  I want the Lord to make himself known to me now.”  

Wouldn’t we all be better off if the Lord revealed himself to us in greater and clearer ways?  Perhaps all that’s lacking is our desire.  Perhaps if we simply asked him to, he would, indeed, make himself increasingly more known to us.

I have been applying this prayer to everyone lately.  “Lord, make yourself known to our President.”  “Lord, make yourself known to the husbands and fathers around the world.”  Again, you get the point.

Worship the Lord

“They will worship…”  Isaiah writes that as the Lord would make himself known to the Egyptians, they would be drawn to worship him.  What other response might there be, anyway?  When God reveals himself - when we see him more for who he really is – our core being wants to bow before him and worship him.  This is one powerful result of praying this simple prayer, “Lord, make yourself known to me.”

Make Vows to the Lord, and Keep Them

The prophet saw this in the Egyptians’ future, that they would make vows to the Lord, and keep them.  It doesn’t say what those specific vows would be, just that they would make them, and keep them.  

As I ponder this, I think that we are not prone to make vows unless we must.  When was the last time you voluntarily promised something without being pressed or even asked?  When was the last time you made a vow to the Lord?  

To be honest, I’m a bit scared to make vows to the Lord.  It’s not something I want to mess around with, for fear of not fulfilling my commitment.  And yet I loathe making room for my weakness.  What I want to do is make a giant vow to the Lord, then do whatever it takes to fulfill it.  

But for now, my vow is simple.  I commit to keep praying, “Lord, make yourself known to us.”

What Does God Want?

“What does God want?”

The Bible reveals the heart of God, and I found some key points in the opening chapter of the book of Isaiah.

“Stop bringing meaningless offerings.”

The people were bringing their appropriate offerings to God, but they were fooling themselves into thinking this pleased God.  It did not.  Why not?  Doesn’t He desire, and even command us to bring offerings?  Yes.  But our offerings must flow out of our righteousness, out of our growing walk with the Lord.  Their offerings did not.  So this is the heart of God:  Offerings are meaningless to Him if we give them alone, without giving Him our own heart first.

What does God want?  Our hearts.  Our lives.  The complete surrender of our being to His Lordship.

“Stop doing wrong.”

This sounds simple enough, but what is “wrong”?  Right and wrong are defined by God and God alone.  If He says something is wrong, we must not do it.  We sometimes think of wrong as illegal, which means that if it’s legal, it’s O.K.  Not necessarily.  We need to define wrong exactly the way God does.

What does God want?  He wants us to stop doing what He says is wrong to do.

“Learn to do right.”

I like the point that we must “learn” to do right.  How do we learn something like golf?  We practice it.  We read about it.  We talk about it with others.  We even go to a teacher for help.  Likewise, how do we “learn to do right”?  We practice it.  We read about it.  We talk about it with others.  We even go to a teacher for help.  A lot of times, doing right just doesn’t seem to come naturally for us.  So we must work at learning to do right.

What does God want?  He wants us to go out of our way to educate ourselves in the art of doing what is right.

“Encourage the Oppressed”

How much do we go out of our way to encourage people?  I hear too much about people in depression and people on medication.  I think a better cure would be for us to encourage one another more.  One preacher said, “This is not a bump in the road, this is a bumpy road.”  With all the blows life has a way of dealing, we need to be there for each other.  We all know that trials are much simpler if someone is going through it with you.  

What does God want?  He wants us to find someone that’s in a rough spot and bring them some encouragement.

I’ll stop here, but I recommend you continue this study on your own by reading Isaiah chapters one through five and look for the heart of God.  

Take Your Turn on the Wall

“Take Your Turn on the Wall”

He rises early, before sunrise.  No need to bathe.  Where he’s going it doesn’t matter.  But there are other preparations necessary.  Guns.  Ammo.  Various other weapons and electronic wizardry to get the job done.  He’s packed.  He’s ready.  He heads out…for The Wall.

CONSTANT WATCH

As he approaches the wall, he doesn’t see the one whom he will soon relieve.  No words will be spoken.  There is no “clocking in” or “clocking out”.  Just a simple, silent transfer of responsibility.  He takes his place on the wall.  When he’s done, another will replace him, though silent and unseen.  Someone must always be on The Wall.

THE WALL

This is how I feel as I take my turn in the church’s Watchmen prayer schedule.  I take it very seriously.  It’s my time on The Wall.  So what is the wall?  For me it symbolizes the higher location, the clearer view, the place between God and people.  This is where I purposely come to pray for many things, and most purposefully, God’s will to be done in our church.  The higher location means I’m drawing closer to the Heavenly Father. 

THE CLEARER VIEW

The wall is always designed to offer the clearest view possible.  I find this to be true when I am praying on “the wall”.  My view of the world, my life, my family, my finances, my work – my view of everything becomes clearer when I am praying, drawing near to God, on the wall.

TAKE YOUR TURN

At the back of the church is a sign-up sheet for the Watchmen prayer schedule.  Our goal is to maintain a constant prayer watch.  Will you join us?  Will you take your turn on the wall?  It’s not as difficult as you might imagine.  All we ask is that on the day you sign up for, you spend at least 15 minutes in prayer.  That’s 15 minutes of drawing near to your Heavenly Father.  So, what are you waiting for?  The view is fantastic!

Go to the Grammys or Keep Your Word?

I write this the day after our church youth group went to a concert in the St. Louis area.  Several major artists were to appear, including two that were nominated for a Grammy award.  

The Grammys are the most prestigious music awards in America.  To win a Grammy means that you have reached the pinnacle of your craft as a music artist.  To be nominated alone is quite an honor, and it also gives you the opportunity to attend the awards show with all of the other top singers and musicians in the world.

So what do you do if you are nominated for a Grammy, but on the night of the awards show, you have already booked a concert?  Do you cancel your concert appearance in order to attend what may be a once in a lifetime chance?  Or do you keep your commitment, even though it was made before you knew about your possible Grammy opportunity?

For some this is a no-brainer.  You go to the Grammys!  It would be like passing up a free trip on the space shuttle, it’s something you just don’t miss.  

But what about that earlier commitment?  Well, surely everyone will understand…

Now let me rewind to our Sunday School lesson that same day.  Philippians 2:5 says, “Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus.”  What was His attitude?  “He humbled himself.”

And how!  Look at the amazing descent of His humility – from God to a man, to a servant, to a servant who died, not just any death, but the kind reserved for the worst people on the planet, capital punishment.

Our attitude should be like His.  He did not claim all of His rights.  Instead He gave them up in order to serve others.  

Yes, you could choose to go to the Grammys.  It’s logical and understandable.  But it’s not noble.

Of the two groups nominated, one chose to attend the Grammys, and the other chose to keep their commitment in St. Louis.  I smile as I report to you that the group that kept their commitment is now the proud owner of a Grammy Award!

Now what about us?  The lesson is easy to hear and challenging to put into practice.  Humble ourselves, in order to serve others.  Don’t claim all of our rights, but instead give them up.  I know there is at least one group of singers today that will attest to the truth of James 4:10, “Humble yourselves in the sight of the Lord, and He will lift you up.”

The X-Man of Ephesians

The X-Man of Ephesians

As a child, a boy to be exact, I was always interested in comic book heroes and their special powers.  The Hulk.  The Thing.  Spider Man.  Thor.  Iron Man (Dave Calhoun’s hero!)  You get the picture.  

One comic book character that has been made more popular in the movies lately is Wolverine.  This man has two superhuman capabilities:  his body heals itself of all wounds, and when he is angry large claws come out as weapons.  Actually these claws are very long razor-sharp knives that extend from his knuckles.

I want to use Wolverine’s special powers to illustrate two principles.  First let’s look at his “claws”.  You know, we all have claws like this that can cause great harm to others.  They are our words, and they tend to inflict more pain when we are angry.

My goal is to eliminate all the claws from my words.  It’s a very difficult task, but I think God is for it and will help accomplish it.

Watch your words, and how often there are claws in them meant to do harm.  Look for little sharp comments that give a little “dig” at someone.  

Recently I was answering a complaint letter sent to the radio station where I work.  As a professional, I take great care to word such letters in exactly the right way.  I try to make sure there is not a single claw.  After I write a letter like that I often set it aside, then read it a little later from a fresh perspective, again trying to ensure that I am not simply “snapping back”.

Unfortunately we do not have that time luxury in most conversations.  When someone is speaking to us, a response is required immediately.  In the course of normal conversation, can we remove the barbs, the claws?  Can we sand off all the rough edges?  

Why should we “de-claw” ourselves?  Because the Bible says in Ephesians 4:29-32 that we should only say things “helpful for building others up” and words that “benefit those who listen”.  It also instructs us to get rid of “every form of malice”.

HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE

I love that little phrase, and it’s so true.  When do our claws come out?  When we are hurt or threatened.  Recently someone said some less-than-kind things to me, and it caught me off guard.  As I pondered it later I think something I had done may have hurt their feelings.  When we are hurt, our claws come out and we strike back.  It’s human nature.  

But if it’s “hard-wired” into us, how can we avoid it?  Here is where Wolverine’s other super power comes in, the immediate healing.  

When a foe injured Wolverine, it was short-lived.  No matter how deep the cut, it didn’t last.  Soon the wound was completely healed, leaving no scars.

That’s the way we need to be when people wound us.  It’s called the power of forgiveness.

Back to Ephesians 4, where verse 32 says, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”  This is the foil to the mortal coil (that wording is just for you, Pastor John!)

People will wound us and hurt us.  That is a given.  But can we be like Wolverine and heal up instantly?  Yes, we can.  Forgiving brings the healing.  The sooner we forgive, the sooner we are healed from any wounds.

I imagine it this way.  Someone claws me with their words.  I feel the pain, followed by the desire to respond out of my own hurt.  But then, like Wolverine, the wound instantly heals as I instantly forgive.  Now, instead of responding with claws out of my own anger and pain, I can respond as Christ calls me to respond, with kindness and compassion.

So there you have it.  My goal for the year:  Remove all claws and barbs from my speech, and heal instantly when claws and barbs injure me.  

Come and See My Zeal for the Lord

“Come and see my zeal for the Lord!”

--Jehu (2 Kings 10:16)

I love that declaration by Jehu!  Then the Bible records that with Charlton Heston bravado Jehu jumped into a chariot and rode off to do the will of God.  Now that should appeal to every Alpha Male in my readership today.  I mean, it has all the ingredients we love:  1)  A bold declaration, 2) A cool word that begins with a “Z”, 3) A chariot, and 4) Action, baby!

A Bold Declaration

We like bold declarations.  Say it loud and say it proud!  And once you declare it, it’s set in stone.  “Look, I said it.  I meant it.  And if you try to make me go back on it, I’ll die first!”  Some guys have that zeal for their “team” (for crying out loud…).  How about a little zeal for the Lord God almighty?!  Make a bold declaration, loud and proud, of what you will do for the Lord, and make it big!  Then don’t back down from it.  Die for it, but don’t wimp out.

A Cool Word That Begins With “Z”

You know, like Zorro or something.  We like cool words and phrases, like “Red Zone.” Well, zeal is one of those words.  ZEAL!!!  It even looks cool.  Look your neighbor in the eye and shout “Zeal, baby!” and give them a crushing head butt (only if you are wearing your Brad-Stein-helmet).  But really, that’s a word you can rally around.  We Christians need to work together, you know, get in a huddle, work out a plan, put our hands together, and “Zeal on three.  O.K. One.  Two.  ‘Zeal!’”  (Zealous people sometimes have problems with patience…)  

A Chariot

Jehu had a chariot.  What’s your machine?  Use it to carry out your zeal for Christ.  Ride it to your destination, where you are going to do the will of God.  Let your chariot be filled with prayers and praise and intercessions.  Show your zeal in your automobile!  You call that little stick fish ZEAL?!  SHOW ME YOUR ZEAL FOR THE LORD!!!

Action, Baby!

Why are so many churches loaded with more women than men?  No action!  But show me a church making a bone-jarring impact on their community and I’ll bet it’s a church loaded with men full of zeal for the Lord!  You want men involved?  Then give them something to win.  That’s why men rhymes with win (bear with me here).  But really, men want to get out and do something.  There’s a time for talk, but then there’s a time for action, and that action needs to be in the middle of the will of God.  

Long Summary

Just do it!